Etiquette for parties and clubs.
We all want to have fun with the people we meet, the best way to achieve this is by using good manners, and treating everyone you contact or meet with the same respect you want them to show you. I am not going to write a full etiquette book here, but offer some simple guidelines that we have found work as well now as they did when we entered the scene Courtesy Works
Everyone in the swinging scene has their own unique set of reasons for being there, and their own personal baggage in the shape of insecurities. Be polite when meeting them, be friendly and open when talking to them, and if you get to play with someone, thank them afterwards.Being polite does not mean you have to play with everyone, but if you want to turn someone down, do so gently – remember there will be times you will be turned down, so think how you would like to be treated.
Whether or not you are personally interested in swinging with someone, be polite. You never know, you may share many other interests or you may meet that person again, and they may introduce you to someone with whom you ARE compatible and do wish to share time.
Party hosts spend a lot of time making arrangements for parties. They have to choose who to invite, send the invitations, prepare the venue, the entertainment and the food and drinks.If a host chooses to invite you, common decency would suggest that you should respond, even a negative response is better than no response. Leaving it to the day of the party to say yes or no makes it almost impossible for the host to decide on catering requirements.
Attending a club, or a paid party does not require any gifts or money from you beyond the door fee. But if you are attending a private party, then good manners suggest that you should take something with you.Don’t take along a cheap bottle of wine or a few beers, then proceed to drink the spirits brought by the other guests. Take along a bottle of the drink that you and your partner will be drinking. If you want to score an extra few points with the hosts, take along a little keep-sake for the hostess.
Don’t expect the hosts to provide everything, remember that there could be 50 other people at the party, and few house party hosts will have enough toiletries or towels to cope with that many people.Take whatever you personally are going to need with you. Carry a small toiletry bag for spare underwear, hairbrush, comb, toothbrush, cologne, intimate cleansing articles, condoms, etc.. If you plan to stay over, sleeping bags or blankets and pillows are necessities.
Nothing turns a person off faster and more effectively than an unclean body or stale breath. Even if you shower and perfume yourself before you leave home, it is always a good idea to freshen up again when you arrive at your destination. Travelling more than a few miles will undo a lot of your personal grooming.
Have respect for the feelings of others.
Be aware, just like you, not everyone is comfortable in all situations, Keep your eyes open for signs that your partner, as well as others, is relaxed and enjoying themselves. If someone is not comfortable, try helping them over the rough spots. Remember, you were a beginner once yourself. If it is obvious that things are not working out, remain polite and courteous; but alert the host. Keep in mind that not all people feel the same about things.
If you are interested in swinging with someone, let them know in an friendly way; if they are interested, they will respond positively. If they are not and say “No, thank you,” do not ask WHY. No amount of sweet talk or coercion on your part will change their mind and will probably work against you. Everyone has the right to say “NO” at all times, to anyone, without explanation. Never forget that.
Do not allow yourself to become sexually involved with anybody that you are not interested in. There is no reason to involve yourself in a scene that you are not comfortable with. You are at the party, and in the swinging lifestyle to enjoy yourself, so only do what you want, when you want and with whom you want.
How to say “NO”One of the basic tenets in swinging is the right of anyone to say “No” at any time.In the swinging world everyone accepts the premise that everyone has the right to say “No” to anyone at anytime.Saying “NO” should be done with a simple “No thank you”. Never try to give an explanation, because that is what usually causes the problems and the pain.